br>
br>
Monday, March 22, 2004
You stood before me, but all I could feel was suppressed fear. A fear that shook me to the bones. A fear that surprised me. Why would I be afraid of someone I love? Why would someone who loves me want to hurt me? I don't know, and I don't understand.
I look into your eyes, searching for some love and compassion. Your cool and composed eyes stare back at me. Tears threatened to fall. Taking a deep breath, I told myself that I wouldn't cry. Looking up again, I begin to see the hurt and pain in your eyes. I believed that you loved me at that moment. But you couldn't stop yourself then, it's too late. The show will have to go on.
Finally, you let go of me, and walked home. Watching you leave, I walked away too, in a different direction. Wiping away my tears with the back of my hands, I struggled to regain compose. I didn't walk far though. I didn't walk long too.
Because I turned and walked back to your house, back to you.
Tears...
And more tears...
Crumpled on the cool tiles of your bathroom floor, I buried my head in my kness and cried. Anguish cries that filled the lonely bathroom. I thought my tears wouldn't stop falling at that moment. Until you knocked on the door. Until you gathered me in your arms. Until I felt your love.
And miraculously, I stopped crying.
You have that much power over me.
Snuggling close to you, inhaling your familiar scent that I've grew so accustomed to, I find the will in my heart to forgive you again. For you, I can pretend that nothing had happened. For you, I can pretend that everything would be fine. For you, I can never give up our love.
You, it's always you.
Maybe one day, our love can really overcome all obstacles and bring us happiness.
Or maybe one day, we'll realise that everything was just a perfect masquerade.
4:06:00 AM
Yours Truly
Ingrid
25 years old
Kievan's Mommy
Still Pink Lovin'
Faded Memories
October 2003
November 2003
December 2003
January 2004
February 2004
March 2004
April 2004
May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
August 2004
February 2005
April 2005
June 2005
November 2005
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
April 2007
March 2010
deep inside me. a silent whisper in my mind.
sweet surrender to your love divine. peace enfolding.
in the stillness i empty my soul. and your healing presence flows.
as i breathe the air of heaven. drawing in your fragrance when i breathe.
i feel your fullness come alive inside of me. you're the breath that i breathe.
it's taking hold. like a second nature when i savour. savour you. as i breathe.